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I go round and round on my thoughts of today and those of immediate past... my thoughts and concerns of those who are suffering from a situation that is and was far beyond their control... those who said it is time to leave... that who had said stay where you are... those that were left behind or forgotten... because of age or convenience... there are those who see misfortune as opportunity... and those who see a grander picture... and truly in the end it is those who have and those who have not... But I think there must come a point when we say... this is a tragic situation and there are no clear answers... we want to blame one and hold others accountable... we want to point but not see the real truth... and while all this is hard to watch... we have seen it before and will again... we come to the aid of those in need and offer ourselves to those without... money flows freely... offerings from many in amounts that touch hearts and yet within a short amount of time life becomes normal in the blink of an eye... and while we have broken hearts today for those in great need... tomorrow we will be again with our feet planted in the same position as we find ourselves today until the next big tragedy strikes... human kind and we decide to be more than we are... if only for a moment in time... today tomorrow and always

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So it goes…

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The memory is a funny being... i see so clearly yesterday... those are the stories we share... our pictures are perfect....full of color... scenes filled with love... life... experience... tasted... treasured... it is part of a bigger picture... i see a life before... when time often stood still just based on a mood... the end of a day... the depth of a moment... captured in time...yet brought to life... through the heart of another... one created in unconditional love... that which brought a light into a world that began dark... story less... distant... misunderstood... yet... as time passed and days of darkness became filled with memories of another day... one who was before a time... who gave an all for the sake of a cause... which unbeknownst to you... your time had not come... yet in the sunrise again on another day... which the heart of this one gave life to another... i for one never felt that truth until I dared to dream... of a small love that would fill a place that was never...
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Well this is the end of the first day of possibly many or even a few... i have tried to remain positive, consistent, hard, just... and right this moment I do not know how I feel... what I should feel... this is truly a place where I knew I was and yet decided to deny... the disease infests, inhabits,  enables the distrust to enter behind a steady fast faith... no matter how distant the goal seems to be... the nearer desire... to want to be relived of a heaviness that can only be explained by the action of others... who have been placed in an environment of trust... misfortune... resort... lack of choice... so to end this day in a place of even more uncertainty... no different from the recent past... i wonder outloud... is this really what you had in mind for me... again...
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