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As the day ends... and you look reflect upon your successes... are you asking yourself... was I all that is could be...did I give where I should have given... did I share with those in need.... did I smile at a stranger... did I thank the one who served my meal... who bag your groceries... offer an ear for listening... a shoulder to cry on... are these reasons enough in you to to be thankful and recognize how blessed you truly are....

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Well this is the end of the first day of possibly many or even a few... i have tried to remain positive, consistent, hard, just... and right this moment I do not know how I feel... what I should feel... this is truly a place where I knew I was and yet decided to deny... the disease infests, inhabits,  enables the distrust to enter behind a steady fast faith... no matter how distant the goal seems to be... the nearer desire... to want to be relived of a heaviness that can only be explained by the action of others... who have been placed in an environment of trust... misfortune... resort... lack of choice... so to end this day in a place of even more uncertainty... no different from the recent past... i wonder outloud... is this really what you had in mind for me... again...
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